Manas Garg Speaks

I was talking to my little niece today, and asked her how was she spending her vacations.

Little Niece: “I’m taking a computer basics course and also Bharatnatyam classes”.

Obviously not interested in Bharatnatyam, I asked her what is it that she was learning in the computer class.

Little Niece: “Windows, Paint and all”.

Aha! Windows, Paint and all! Thats my Microsoft! 

Me: “You know, I work with Microsoft”

Little Niece: “Hmmm.. Microsoft? So what? Even I work with Microsoft Word!”

That shut me up.

Thanks to Alagu for tagging me. I was planning to sleep, then I discovered that I’ve been tagged - and so here I am.. writing this post :)

Last movie seen in a theatre:
Iron Man - Found it childish. Stupid Sci Fi has never excited me.

What book are you reading?
Theoritically - Freakonomics, The Namesake, Oracle E-Business Suite Administration
Practically - None.

Favourite board game:
Monopoly

Favourite magazine:
Reader’s Digest

Favourite smells:
Smell of rain, Green Apples, pretty wet hair

Favourite sound:
The sound doorbell makes when I reach home after months.

Worst feeling in the world:
Being stuck - and hopelessly.

What is the first thing you think of when you wake up?
I’m late.

Favourite fast food place:
Mc Donald’s

Future child’s name:
Khushi

Finish this statement, “If I had a lot of money I’d…”
Become a professional backpacker.

Do you drive fast?
Rarely.

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?
No. I’m one.

Storms - Cool or Scary?
Cool

Do you eat the stems on broccoli?
Don’t know.

If you could dye your hair any colour, what would be your choice?
Electric Blue. 

Name all the different cities/towns you have lived in:
Lucknow, Aligarh, Shahjahanpur, Ghaziabad, Tiruchirapalli, Hyderabad 

Favourite sports to watch:
None.

One nice thing about the person who sent this to you:
I find him respectable and cool.

What’s under your bed?
Nothing.

Would you like to be born as yourself again?
Yes, Yes!

Morning person or night owl?
Both - I work late nights and mornings and afternoons and evenings and … ;)

Over easy or sunny side up?
???

Favourite place to relax:
A lap.

Favourite ice cream flavour:
Vanilla

You pass this tag to –
Hari, Geetanjali, Kshitija, Tushar(Ma), Hepsiba

Of all the people you tagged this to, who’s most likely to respond first?
Dunno.

Here are the ones I found till now:

http://www.google.com.au/intl/en/gday/index.html

http://mail.google.com/mail/help/customtime/index.html

The other two are in Korean and Japanese and so not posting them here.

Will update if I find any more :)

Happy April fool’s day everyone! Its your day! ;)

Update: Here is the BIG one!! The Virgle project!

http://www.google.com/virgle/index.html

Update #2 : Orkut turned into yogurt:

Let me share another childhood memory with you - a funny one this time.

—

When I was a kid, before my voice cracked, I had a very thin voice. In simpler terms, I had a voice that sounded very much like a girl’s. I was teased a lot, and I used to wait for the day when my voice would crack.

People used to think I was my dad’s daughter if I happened to pick up the phone - they just assumed it hearing my voice. It was embarrassing. Imagine me explaining - “Uncle, I’m not his daughter. I’m his son.” Sometimes I used to correct people, most of the times I did not - just used to give the phone to my dad and wait for the day when my voice would crack.

Once it got ugly. Some guy started started blank calling our home phone thinking that there was a girl in the house! This when I am the only child of my parents and I was in class IV and I was a guy.

I used to tell that guy ‘Dude, I’m not a girl. I’m a guy. You’re wasting your time and money.’ But that dude never believed me. I used to laugh my head off when that unknown guy used to call and go like ‘Madam, please talk to me. Please give me a pappi (Hindi slang for a kiss)’.  

Finally, after years of wait, my voice cracked and I started sounding like a man. Thank god! :)

So many of us looking to make a quick buck by starting websites :) See this.

Thanks Murali for sharing the link :)

Here is a list of things that change as you move out of college (a residential campus) to a full fledged job :

1. Money : Suddenly your financial condition changes. Your previous total monthly expenditure becomes you typical weekend expenditure. You can buy many things you want to without thinking too much. You get a credit card. You realize that you are not making enough money.

2. Phone : Your phone changes from a 1100 to N series. The prepaid connection is the thing of the past, and you get a post-paid corporate connection.

3. Phone Bills : Don’t ask.

4. Room : Finally a bathroom all for yourself! (Yes!). Though not very furnished initially, there are NO course books to be seen, the flooring is marble, and the walls don’t speak the history for who all have lived in the room for the last 17 years. Oh yes! There are cupboards where you can actually hang clothes AND lock them too!

5. Transport : From a Hercules Thriller, you upgrade to a Bajaj Pulsar. Or  the company cab, as the case may be.

6. Washing : No more washing clothes yourself! You get a washing machine. You actually wear clean clothes everyday.

7. Trips to home : Become exceedingly rare. Once in 6 months is the average.

8. Holidays : Become the most precious thing. People would give blood to get a holiday. You get about 12 every year excluding weekends. Add 20 Casual leaves to that. Thats it. No more.

9. Travel : No more Sleeper class, Air Deccan and Indigo become your best friends. Even when you want to travel by train and save some money, you cant coz you cant afford to take that extra day off. 

10. Bunks : If your office has swiping system, forget it. If it doesn’t, you feel so guilty if you bunk that you don’t.

11. Cleaning : A ‘bai’ comes to clean up your room and kitchen. But! She won’t clean the bathrooms! So the bathrooms and toilets (that you’re supposed to clean yourself now) resemble the hostel bathrooms.

12. Food : One pain in the ass! Breakfast and lunch @ office usually. Dinner outside. You get bored with outside food (and hate to pay so much for food, everyday!). Weekends are terrible, when you’re left to scavenge for your own 3 meals. You miss the comfort of the mess at times.

13. Treatment : For a change, people treat you nicely. The guards and support staff instead of telling you to ‘Poda’ call you ‘Sir’. Sweet sounding females call you everyday and offer you miscellaneous financial accessories ranging from credit cards, personal loans to health insurance. You tell them that you’re not interested and bang the phone. In their disappointed faces.

14. Internet : You download a 1 GB movie in an hour in office. You use office laptop to watch movies at home. You get Airtel broadband and a netgear wifi router at home.

15. Tax : You start worrying about tax. As March comes closer, you get well aquanted with the provisions of section 80c, 80cc and 80ccc of the Indian constitution. You buy insurance policies and pray to God to call you soon so that at least you won’t have to pay tax.

16. Immunity : Your immunity goes down suddenly. A glass of water outside, if  not branded Kinley or Aquafina, gives you throat infection. So does any chicken curry priced below Rs 135.

I’m sure I’ve missed many, help me increase this list :)

The ad goes like this: “There are some things money can’t buy. For everything else … ”

Wait a minute! Those some-things-money-cant-buy are the only things I crave for!

“when you really want something to happen, the whole universe conspires so that your wish comes true”
-The Alchemist

Sometimes you get this itch to complete things that have been pending for a very long time. Like for the last couple of days, I’ve had this killing thirst to finish reading The Hitchhiker’s Guide to Galaxy. I started reading this a couple of years back (well, yeah) but had to abandon for some reason I don’t remember.

So there I was sitting in my office on a Friday evening. What better way to mark the end of the weekdays than to get H2G2 from a bookstore and make the best of a weekend?!

I went to Walden book store - pretty nice. Sadly, They were out of stock.

I din’t lose heart - No Sir! I went straight to the City Center mall where they have the best book store in town - Crosswords. I made a dash to the fiction section and was amazed to find myself amidst huge racks of sci-fi. It did not take even a minute - I found the Douglas Adams shelf right in front of me. My heart leapt. I could already hear the drumming in my ears. I could easily see The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Life the Universe and Everything, So Long and Thanks for All the Fish and even Mostly Harmless!!

Later, the man at the counter told me that the Hitchhiker’s Guide to Galaxy is not expected to be in stock for the next 10 days.

Alchemist! Are You listening?